Searching for Self-Esteem?

How Do You Judge Your Worth?

by: Rabbi YY Jacobson

Counting the Jews

The opening verses of this week’s Torah portion, Ki Sisa, convey G-d’s instruction to Moses on how to count the Jewish people. When it is necessary to conduct a census, Jews are to be counted not in an ordinary manner, person by person, but rather, every member of the community should contribute a coin for charity, and then the coins should be counted to determine how many people contributed.
What is the rationale behind this instruction? Why the need to count the community in such a round-about fashion, rather than simply counting the people directly?
Two messages, it seems, are being conveyed here.
What Are You Worth?
First, the Torah is suggesting that you are counted not based on who you are but on what you give. Your genuine value and worth spring forth from your contribution to another soul, from the love and kindness you impart to another heart.
Sir Moses Montefiore, a 19th century Jewish international diplomat and philanthropist, was once asked how much he was worth. The wealthy man thought for a while and named a figure. The other replied, “That can’t be right. By my calculation you must be worth many times that amount.”
Moses Montefiore’s reply was this: “You didn’t ask me how much I own. You asked me how much I’m worth. So I calculated the amount I have given to charity this year and that is the figure I gave you. You see,” he said, “we are worth what we are willing to share with others.”
Evaluating a people
Yet, there seems to be a one more vital message presented in this instruction, one that would reverberate throughout history.
To appreciate the value and greatness of a people, the Torah is suggesting, you must study not the number of its bodies, but the breadth of their contributions. What matters most is not the quantity of its adherents, but rather their commitment towards making a difference and their inspiration and readiness to make sacrifices for their values and ideals. Numbers can be deceiving. Large groups of people often barely leave a trace. On the other hand, there are times that small groups, when committed heart and soul to their mission statement, have left an enormous impact, totally disproportionate to their numbers.
To appreciate the significance of Jewish existence, the Bible is telling us, you must study not its numbers: Jews never constituted more than one percent of society. Rather, you must examine the impact this little monotheistic group has had on the world. Other nations, cultures and civilizations enjoyed far greater numbers, larger territories and mightier armies. But no other person or nation has left an impression on the very fabric of civilization as the relatively few and often hunted and persecuted descendants of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
As Catholic writer Thomas Cahill wrote in his national bestseller The Gifts of the Jews: How a Tribe of Desert Nomads Changed the Way Everyone Thinks and Feels:
“Most of our best words in fact – new, adventure, surprise; unique individual, person, vocation; time, history, future; freedom, progress, spirit; faith, hope and justice—are the gifts of the Jews ... We can hardly get up in the morning or cross the street without being Jewish. We dream Jewish dreams and hope Jewish hopes.”  
Here is a passage by contemporary historian Paul Johnson in his bestseller “History of the Jews:”
"All the great conceptual discoveries of the intellect seem obvious and inescapable once they have been revealed, but it requires a special genius to formulate them for the first time. The Jew has this gift. To them we owe the idea of equality before the law, both divine and human; of the sanctity of life and the dignity of the human person; of the individual conscience and so of personal redemption; of the collective conscience and so of social responsibility; of peace as an abstract ideal and love as the foundation of justice, and many other items which constitute the basic moral furniture of the human mind. Without the Jews, it might have been a much emptier place."
The Power to Love
Just as this is true concerning our national identity, it is true concerning every individual person. At times you may think to yourself, “I am worthless; I amount to nothing.”
Comes the Torah and says, that you on your own, cloistered in your vanity and egotism, may indeed amount to a small, futile creature, unworthy of counting (“If I am only for myself, what am I,” Hillel is quoted as saying in the Ethics of the Fathers). However, each of us has the power to contribute something to the world, to reach out to an individual in need. Each of us has the ability to touch a heart, to lift a spirit, to kindle a soul, to look a fellow human being in the eyes and say “I Love you.” You may be small indeed, but the love and light you can bring to another life through a simple gesture, a sincere “good morning,” or an act of goodness and kindness, is immeasurable and cannot be counted.
~~~~

Comments (7)

why

Monday, Mar 01 2010 - ט"ו אדר תש"ע
Rabbi Eli Hecht
With all respect to you, Why the need to keep on bringing up non Jewish writers, (who's work needs some corrections). for proof etc...stay well rav eli hecht
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thanks

Monday, Mar 01 2010 - ט"ו אדר תש"ע
Ilana
Thanks for such an uplifting email- it is such a great start to the day to receive such powerful messages- I appreciate these emails and hope to pass it on by way of action. A great thank you . Kind regards Ilana Tockar
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"Importance of a Jew"

Tuesday, Mar 02 2010 - ט"ז אדר תש"ע
RivkahLeah
We all know this. However...the one thing that wasw omitted was that what gave us this special place in the world was our commitance to tgrue torah values. The cultural-secular jew soon became assimailated and disappeared!!! So much for bringing light to the world!!!!
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Sadly

Tuesday, Mar 02 2010 - ט"ז אדר תש"ע
fran
Not too many realtors would make that list. Everyone I work with seems to be out for themselves only.
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giving more than just what comes easy

Wednesday, Mar 03 2010 - י"ז אדר תש"ע
chava
my contribution to others defines what I'm worth......a very practical, pro-active equation. I would like to bring out a point you made that sort of drowned in all that patting on the shoulders of us Jews in general: that giving, significant giving, involves making personal sacrifices. Smiling a good morning at someone might come natural to one person, while cutting short a telephone conversation to give a spouse some urgently needed attention means sacrifice to them and giving several hundred shekels or dollars to a destitute person is actually too much to ask of them. For another person, it might be just the other way around. But we all have to make little & big sacrifices if we want to keep giving & increase our self worth.
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Searching for Self-Esteen?

Wednesday, Mar 03 2010 - י"ז אדר תש"ע
Linda Goddard
Thank you, Rabbi Jacobson, for your wise lecture. Your words have meaning for the non-Jew as well. I am sharing this with my friends, Jews and Gentiles alike.
Linda G.
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self- esteem

Wednesday, Mar 03 2010 - י"ז אדר תש"ע
chana sharfstein
When i taught public school my students were given an assignment to write about themselves, focusing on interests, likes and dislikes. We verbalized some thoughts to get stated. When it was time to write, a student asked me how to spell I. When I stated it was just the letter I he became quite upset. He could not easily accept the fact that any reference to him was just with one letter I. Interesting point in contemplating self- esteem. All other personal pronouns consist of at least two letters or more, but each one of us is just I- and I stands alone. When combined with just one other person we double in size to We, yet interstiong to note - only the pronoun I is always spelled with a capital. just some thoughts on the subject.
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