• KG

  Kayla Goldring -2 years ago

  yeesh!  and what about the potato kigel girl?  she's sounds like she is deriding all the homemaking of all of us Jewish women as degrading.  What were our imahos, if not homemakers?  And yet, Avrohom was told to listen to everything  his wife says. What's so intellilgent about her? the fact that she got good grades and doesn't want to be a homemaker? and are the women who ARE homemakers NOT intelligent?  i was looking for my sons for girls whose priority is her home and family.  But certainly not girls who are not intelligent.  My sons have tremendous respect for their wives and help them as much as they can.  They are all able to have deep meaningful conversations with their wives.  and their wives are happy with and take great pride in their role.  i do think this is a widespread problem that is encouraged by the schools and seminaries stuffing the girls with more and more knowledge while never stressing the vital function of akeres habayis.

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  • RR

    Rivqa Raphaelsohn -2 years ago

    Akeres Habayis has nothing to do with cooking and cleaning. If a homemaker wife is important to your son go right ahead and find a girl like that for him. Just realize that this is not the only acceptable role for a frum woman. A woman can set the tone of her household/ be the akeres habayis even while working, leading, or expanding her mind. There is plenty wrong with the schools and seminaries but teaching torah is not one of them! We are not going to improve the community by stuffing down our talents.

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• KG

  Kayla Goldring -2 years ago

  I'm a grandmother, BH, just so you know where i'm coming from, with four married sons.  These podcasts were really phenomenal, as expected.  BUT!  i have a BIG problem with what you told that girl about her past relationships with boys.  In fact, i would even say that she is unrepentant from her saying that this is not "accepted" in our community.

  how can you tell her that there's no need for the poor innocent boy she's dating to know this about her?  Certainly, not later than the third date, which is when we usually disclose physical and mental health issues.  You said maybe down the line she can reveal it?  you mean like after they have 5 children?  You didn't even clarify what she meant.  Was she intimate with these boys?  this must be told way before they get involved, if not up front.  Why is she even dating these types of boys?

  Just my humble opinion.  if a girl would have done that to my sons, it would have been terrible.

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• RR

  Rivki Raphaelson -3 years ago

  Thank you

  I wanted to share with you how moved I was by the workshop tonight. I am currently writing with tears in my eyes. As I was breaking down at several moments during the 2 hours, I questioned what could possibly bring me to this state. I am not usually one to cry at anything. I concluded that it was the respect and empathy which you consistently addressed each single person question. The contrast between your attitude to that of all the shadchanim, community members, and experts I have dealt with over the years highlighted how extremely rare this is. I can't think of a single time I have heard a non-single person speak the way you have with understanding and respect. As a single people, my dearest friends and family do not understand what it is I and my single friends go through. Under all their help and advice is always a deep stream of pity and condescension. Our frum society looks at us singles as broken, useless, hopeless, and pathetic. At worst we are avoided like something contagious. At best we are seen as something to fix. Thank you for acknowledging our humanity, our dignity and respecting our mission in the world whether we are married or single humans. 

   

   

   

   

   

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Dating Series #3

Rabbi YY Jacobson

• April 22, 2021
• |
• 10 Iyyar 5781
• |
• 1556 views

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