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Basics of Emunah #19: Finding G-d in Your Pain

4 Letters of Young Jews; Balancing Questions & Faith; Show Up to Life with All Your Emotions

1 hr 32 min

Class Summary:

The Emunah Series with Rabbi YY Jacobson resumes Thursday, Feb. 15, 2018, and continues every Thursday evening (save holidays), at 20 Forshay Road, Monsey, NY, followed by Q and A. For Men, Women and Teenagers (separate seating). You can send questions in advance by email to [email protected] or submit written questions before or during the presentation. Anonymity of the questioners will be respected. Hot food will be served. No admission fee.

Please leave your comment below!

  • RL

    Rochel Leah -1 year ago

    Thank you so much for your amazing classes!!!

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  • HF

    Hudi Fischman -2 years ago

    In Pain and Being Grateful

    How does coming to Hashem with my pain go together with focusing on the good.

    By wollowing in the pain I just get get into a pity party and start asking why me? 

    I have been taught that if you are gratefult to Hashem he will give you more good.

    I have also been taught not to ask why me, since we dont want Hashem to take us to the Olam Hames and show us the full picture.

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  • A

    Aviva -5 years ago

    Thanks you very much uplifting and inspiring 

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  • I

    Isaac -6 years ago

    Hi rabbi. Thank you so much for all your wonderful shiurim. I was listening to the speech titled "finding gd in your pain" and you mentioned there is a recording of the ben ish chai's voice. I couldn't find it on the internet. I'd really like to hear it. If you can help me with this I'd really appreciate it. Thank you!

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  • S

    Sara -6 years ago

    Great minds...

    I listened to the reading of the first letter with such nachas. I could have written it!  I told my husband, who is usually the one who has to listen to my philosophical pilpulim, "See, it isn't just me who thinks like this!"


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  • C

    Chaim -6 years ago

    Best Answer

    I have a close friend that lost a child at a young age. I went to be menachem avel and he asks me, "nu, can you tell me some diverei chizuk?"  I said I came to sit and cry with you... He replied, that's the best  chizuk I heard so far in this shiva!

    I immensely enjoyed the last Emunah shiur and emotionally overtaken by the letters you read. Maybe dedicate a full shiur to ONLY reading letters, finishing with: "I don't know."


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  • S

    Sholom -6 years ago


    Dear Rabbi Jacobson shlita,

    Amazing class.

    Thank you so much for being 'so real'. You are empowering so many of us to approach life and avodas Hashem so much more genuinely and positively.


    Can you please explain the following.

    In this class one of the things that you explained was that in times of pain to embrace it and find Hashem there with you in the times of pain. Very powerful. 

    How specifically does this concept work together with tracht gut vet zein gut? Tracht get veet zein gut, seems to imply and Iwant the situatiuon to be different, I want it to be revealed good. Perhaps trucht gut it is a later stage perhaps? How does the first stage of not running away and not denying the pain but rather experiencing it with Hashem, transition into the tracht gut stage?

    Thank you so much,

    Yaarich yomim al mamlachtecho!

    Your friend

    Sholom K

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  • Anonymous -6 years ago

    According to Rabbi Manis Friedman, (watch YouTube Adam and Eve, the whole story doesn't make sense, until now.)


    God did create a perfect world. It's called Gan Eden. Bobby Chavah, chose for us to come to this world.

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  • Anonymous -6 years ago

    בלי מילים! חזק חזק ונתחזק

    איך וועל שרייבן אין אידיש ווייל דאס איז מייין מאמע לשון,די גרעסטע הוכחה אז השי"ת בעולמינו איז, אז ר' יוסף יצחק בקרבינו. אין אזא טינקעלקייט גיבט ער אונז אזא ליכטיגקייט.  עס רינען נאך טרערן פון מיינע אויגן.

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  • L

    Leah -6 years ago

    A lack of people is a form of pain it's a brocha to have such a nice turn out as this.  I feel isolated, alone, in need of new faces.

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  • L

    Leah -6 years ago

    I wish I could come to monsey!

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  • M

    Miriam -6 years ago

    Rabbi Jacobson i have no words to express my gratitude for your language of the heart the world its yearning for it,
    Jews and gentiles.
    There is so much confusion Hashem should bless you for many years to give over the treaure that you have
    When are you coming to Israel again


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  • Y

    yochanan -6 years ago

    Can you forward us the recording of the Ben Ish Chai, or tell me where I can find it?
    Also you didn't clearly answer that young man from Jerusalems question, should he divorce, should he stop learning? it's very relevant and easy to apply to other people's lives.


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  • J

    Jeff -6 years ago

    you were saying to be a partner in creation....thats why he gave us a life were we struggle to achieve......wow!!!!!! really???? but that itself is a created concept (he could have created that when he would just give us life without problems it would have the same impact accomplishments and achievements that the system thats in place now produces....) doesn't answer the question.... you seemingly gave an answer to an unanswerable question ..gonna save you the details of the pain in my lifeand journey in this world....I get that you celebrate questions...it works for some that need love in their life...and for the first time have the ability to ask....its the first step and you are doing a lot in that matter for allowing that to happen. they will accept it regardless of the answer / if their is answers....but to make like their is an answer - that I don't know how you could do. (like for example take the question of how g-d let the holocaust happen...and ppl would say after the holocaust you could only believe in g-d and not rely on humans...thats nice and all.......true Judaism and spirituality is good great and blissful over a perverted human disgusting world........but the former is not the world we live in...he made space for this possibility to happen so yes if you would be living in g-ds world and in the spiritual hemisphere you would be good and all ....but he was the one that created this world not humans...fand he was the one that gave humans the ability to do bad things...... any answer you give cant cut it. and calling us partners doesn't cut it....your a nice guy for giving your shoulder for ppl to cry on...but how does this answer work. how can you accept this.

    You got to call a spade a spade but above all else I must say I know ppl that are still religious and happy because of the light you have made possible to access with your network. blessing to you.

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  • E

    Eli -6 years ago

    שמעתי וחוויתי מה זה לגלות את הווי'ה בתוך הקושי, הכאב והעצב, כי שם נמצא הווי'ה ורק שם אפשר לגלות אותו ולפגוש אותו פנים בפנים, אין לנו את ההבנה להבין למה, אך לברוח מזה בטח לא תביא את הישועה...
    להרגיש ולפגוש את העצב והכאב זה הריאליות האמיתית, כי זה ריאלי וא"א להיכחש לזה,  ואיפה שיש ריאליות שם נמצא הווי'ה, ואיפה שיש ה' שם נמצא ריאליות....   
    עם הזמן אני זוכה להבין ולחוות את זה ביתר עומק וביתר משמעות עד שכמעט ואין לי ריאליות אחרת אלא הריאליות של הוויה...
    הקשבתי לפירוש היקר מכל ערך, של הבעש"ט על הפסוק של "כי אשר ראיתם את מצרים היום לא תוסיפו לראותם עוד עד עולם" 
    לכן אם אתמודד עם המצריים שבי אזיי אזכה לא לראות אותו עד עולם... 
    אינני אוהב אתגרים, קשיים, צער, כאב ועצב, אך הנני אוהב את הגילוי האלוקית בתוך המבוך הנסתר והקשה הזה, ואין אפשרות אחרת אלא לפגוש את המצריים שבי, ולשבור את כל המחסומים שאומרים לי לברוח מהמצריים שבי, וכשהנני שובר את המחסומים הנ"ל, הנני מגלה את החוויה האלוקית והאוא"ס, וככל שזה יותר קשה, החוויה והאור של הגילוי יותר עמוק ויותר מתוק. 
    אם לא לומדים חסידות, (במקרה הטוב, דהיינו אחד שמחפש טוב לעומת אחד שמחפש רע), א"א להבין את מה שקורה אחרי ששוברים מחסומים, כי אז מגיע כל גלי האורות ואינני יודע לפרש מהו, וכשאינני יודע לפרש מהו, אזיי אני ח"ו יכול ליפול לפירושים של עצת היצר ולברוח שוב מהריאליות ולא לזכות שוב לפגוש את הוויה, אבל עכשיו שלומדים חסידות טהור וקדוש של אדונינו מורינו האדמור הזקן זיע"א מפי רבי יוסף יצחק יעקבסהאן שליט"א, אזיי מבינים מה קורה במודע ומה קורה בתת המודע ויודעים איך ומה קורה עם האורות האלוקית בכדי לגלות עוד עומק, עוד גילוי, עוד תיקון ועוד גאולה וכן הלאה....

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  • Anonymous -6 years ago

    What happened to #18

    I have been listening to this serious the past couple of months, and gained a lot. Seems to be 2 missing: #15 and 18. Is there any way to get them?

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    • Anonymous -6 years ago

      We had an issue with both videos. We will have to redo them and load them beizer Hashem.

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  • D

    Devory -6 years ago


    What I realized is that these speeches are amazing in everyway; they give the ppl the ability to still feel normal even with their thought and feelings about Judaism. That gives them the understanding that they were missing all these years! That is a real plus in today's era! Because it's not always the answer that counts or what's needed; its more the understanding and care that rabbi Jacobson can give over, by sharing the real reality of today.

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  • S

    Shifra -6 years ago

    Confused by your message

    I’ve listened to many of your shiurim and greatly appreciate them.

    Tonight, I was a bit confused about your message about finding Hashem in one’s pain.

    Although I acknowledge my pain with/from the portion He has handed me and speak to Hashem about my pain all the time, I don’t feel angry with Him. In fact, I do turn to seforim and books for chizuk (about Hashem’s goodness and his Master Plan that we cannot understand) and they afford me some “pain relief.”

    What I heard tonight was that by doing that I was pushing Hashem away, that one can only connect to him by wallowing in one’s pain and/or being angry at him.

    Is that what you meant to say?

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    • R

      Rochel -6 years ago

      I think it's so beautiful that you can fully connect to Hashem through hashkafa and in doing so you can bring your emotions and your pain along. You should cherish that connection to Hashem and I don't think that Rabbi YY was in any way telling you not to. Rather he was talking to the many people who find it impossible, even after learning hashkafa, to bring their emotional world into agreement with their intellectual world. For some, the hurt and the anger does not subside even after learning all the seforim and they are left with a deep sense of confusion. They can't reconcile these two parts of themselves so they either get lost in their pain and leave the hashkafa behind or they bury/deny their pain and get lost in the hashkafa. In either case they find themselves very distant from Hashem because a part of them is not in the relationship. I think what Rabbi YY was telling us is that it's important for us to approach Hashem with all our pain and all our emotions - even the ones that might not fit with our hashkafa. In that way we are approaching Hashem with our whole self.
      But for someone like yourself who is able to bring your emotions into sync with your hashkafa and approach Hashem fully with both your intellect and heart - Wow! that's awesome. You don't suffer that confusion and you can approach Hashem fully through hashkafa.
      But I'm wondering if perhaps there might be a message here even for someone such as yourself. You said that the hashkafa affords you some "pain relief". But what if sometimes there is a little pain left over that the hashkafa can't nudge away. What if even after learning the seforim you still feel a tear slowly moving down your cheek. Or perhaps a lingering "why" in the back of your mind. You don't have to "wallow" in it. But it's okay. You can bring that tear and that "why" to Hashem and place it front of him together with all the hashkafa you learned and you might feel even closer to Him.

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      • Y

        yybc -6 years ago

        wow, Rochel.  Your perspective is incisive and thorough.  You'd make a great editor for R' YY!  I personally don't know really how to bring the tears and doubts to H, but it resonates nevertheless.  I will now work on it more than ever.

        Thank you.

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  • Anonymous -6 years ago

    Thank You!

    Rabbi, I am still in tears after last night shiur (Emunah #19).


    I have so much to thank YOU for getting me closer to Ha'shem. But then I relize, that I am thanking Ha'shem for getting me close to you!


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  • S

    sheva -6 years ago

    How do you orove to God that you believe in him? What can or should you say or how do you prove to him that you do believe in him?

    Also, when one is going through difficult times and they have a good cry, whether it's a grateful cry for what they do have or just a painful cry because they're lonely or disappointed or afraid, does G-d view that as not believing?

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    • Anonymous -6 years ago

      Dear Sheva,

      I have read your comment/questions and I am not going to pretend that I got answers. But I am going to tell you that number 1, I understand and feel your questions. Number 2, is that I am not sure you intended to post your questions as a public forum/comment. You can reach the rabbi privately at [email protected] and with my experience he does answer (eventually).

      All the best and good luck in your learning/growing experiences.

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  • Anonymous -6 years ago


    Where's the broadcast???

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The Emunah Series

Rabbi YY Jacobson

  • February 15, 2018
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  • 30 Sh'vat 5778
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Dedicated by Reb Mendel Zilberberg shlita

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