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The Pain of Being Single

"I'm Having Such a Hard Time Finding My Shidduch"

1 hr 25 min

Class Summary:

Navigating the sometimes turbulent waters of shidduchim. Recognizing Hashem's hand along our journey and welcoming our personal Geulah.

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  • B

    bracha -8 months ago

    wow unbelievable! thank you for understanding and speaking words of depth and chizzuk to people are real and have an emotional world!

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  • M

    Mark -9 months ago

    We are divine beings in human form, following the will of our creator to the best of our ability and beyond - marriage won't make you whole - it supplements your wholeness, which is already there within you ,  in a very profound way to help achieve the will hashem in this world

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  • N

    null -9 months ago

    Bereshit:  לא טוב:  To be alone (by himself) no good. One can respect it but nonetheless what a miserable life despite all the rest, no partner no children no familial love.לא טוב  . All the rest is rationalization. Yes support sistem can delute , but not everybody has a decent support system.

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    • Anonymous -9 months ago

      There are many singles like you that feel the same way. If you are "marriage material" Hashem should help you find one of them right away. If you are not, please realize that you have other qualities that make you a good person. Hashem has no extra people in this world and every one of them serves a specific purpose.

      In any case, try to find people that are in a similiar situation to yours. Although companionship cannot take the place of marriage, we should do all we can to make the best out of whatever situation we are in. Doing nothing but complaining about our situation is not coming from a healthy place and is very deterimental. Hatzlacha Rabbah!

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  • B

    Brocha -9 months ago

    Question for Rabbi YY

    What do I do if I have a wonderful father but he gets nervous about the boys I date if they are good enough and distracts me. How is the best way to handle this.

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    • Anonymous -9 months ago

      One of the biggest causes of staying single are parents who think their child is better than any shidduch that walks through the door. You are in better shape than many in this situation because you recognize the issue and also recognize the negative reaction that this is causing within you. Do your best to ignore your father's concerns since you realize that the issue is not your date, but your father who is nervous. Hatzlacha Rabbah!  

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  • Anonymous -9 months ago

    Hi what should I do if I have 2 brothers in shidduchim above me and I can start but I want to wait should I wait?

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    • Anonymous -9 months ago

      Don't wait - the idea of waiting for an older sibling comes from Lavan

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      • Anonymous -9 months ago

        Some additional thoughts:

        There is no greater segulah for finding a shidduch than an older sibling being mevater and encouraging a younger sibling whose time has come to start shidduchim. Each one should daven for the other to find their bashert.

        Hashem has a time frame for everybody and one sibling is not necessarily connected to another. Any parent who wants to institute a rule that siblings must marry in order should learn sifrei Emunah and Bitochon and then ask a Gadol Hador if this rule is Daas Torah - I assure you that it is not. 

        There have been too many houses where many of the children never got married because the oldest or one of the older siblings never got married and by the time the younger siblings received permission to start shidduchim .... Hatzlacha Rabbah!

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