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Giving Up Everything You Own for a Shiduch?

Likkutei Sichos Chayei Sarah

1 hr 9 min

Class Summary:

Giving Up Everything You Own for a Shiduch? - Likkutei Sichos Chayei Sarah

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  • R

    Rafi -11 years ago

    Chabad the best
    Hi Rabbi Garelik,  I always enjoy your classes and I appriciate that you live in a world where chabad is your main focus. I would like to take the operunity to share my opinion with you. While you are on this website, which is open to the public, please keep an open mind during your classes and remember that there is Judaism outside of Chabad. Your comment about the Shluchim conference is out of place and is incorrect. We recently had a shiyum hasash with over 90k people. There are many other events, in Eretz Yisroel and Chutz, that are big and phenomenal. I have heard this kind of approach in some of your other classes and I can tell you that it is offputting and not the way to spread Chasidus. Please take this in considiration for your future classes and keep on doing your great work. Your classes really are amazing, and you have a lovely passion for what you teach. Hatzlocho,  Rafi

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    • A

      Anonymous -11 years ago

      Re: Chabad the best
      Dear Rafi,

      Thank you for your observations (and compliments....).

      I am delighted that you enjoy the classes and that you also take the initiative of commenting and I hope you will do so in the future.

      From reading your comment (which I appreciate), I believe that there is a little misunderstanding and allow me to try to dispel it:

      You write and I quote: “Your comment about the Shluchim conference is out of place and is incorrect. We recently had a Siyum Hashas with over 90k people. There are many other events, in Eretz Yisroel and Chutz, that are big and phenomenal”.

      It is obvious that there is a misunderstanding here (and you may have missed the second half of my statement):

      First, I am sure that you don’t entertain the notion that I am not aware of the Siyum Hashas and how many people were there and how many people were there… I am very well aware of the Siyum Hashas, and as a matter of fact, the shiur I gave that week in Likutei Sichos was a siyum on a masechta in honor of the Siyum Hashas, and I also mentioned anecdotes between The Rebbe and Rav Meir Shapiro etc. Yes, it was unquestionably one of the largest events and Kidush Hashem and had many more attendees than the Kinus Hashluchim etc.

      However, every “gathering” of people has its “uniqueness” and “nature”:

      What is the “uniqueness” and the “nature” of the Siyum Hashas (for example)? People that lead totally different lifestyle have one thing in common which unites them: they devote an hour (or more) every day to learn a Daf. Yes, it is truly amazing how – Boruch Hashem – so many people join in. Nevertheless, after the shiur of the Daf, they, rightfully, go to their own businesses and lifestyles (they don’t learn the daf 24/7). So their common denominator at the Siyum is not their lifestyle or business, it is the “daf” and, obviously, they represent themselves (and not those who do not learn the Daf). So the “nature” of the siyum Hashas is unique to the concept of “Daf Hayomi”.

      On the other hand, the Kinus hashluchim is unique in a totally different “nature”: There are  thousands of individuals (and their wives and children)  who are devoted 24/7 365 days a year to the same exact agenda which basically consist of (and not limited) to move even to the furthest corners of the world, to places where there may not be any yidishkeit (or minimal) and they go and do their Shlichus and with total “Bitul” to their Rebbe and they affect hundreds and thousands of people (who some of them even come to the Kinus or at least identify with it) and they affect all parts of jewish life globally. This is something unique in style and history. And this is what I was referring to. And therefore I chose my words that there is no other organization that can say this.

      In summation - It is not a question of “numbers” [as you insinuate] rather of “agenda” and “nature”. I never insinuated that this was the “largest” event or any of that. I was referring to its unique phenomena; and it is very customary to stress each event with its unique phenomena. That does not mean that other events are refuted….

      Lastly, I invite you to see the opening remarks of Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, chief Rabbi of the united kingdom, in his speech last year to the Kinus Hashluchim (and the guests prior to him). They are far more than what I said….

      And I am sure you know that Rabbi Sacks (despite his remarks) also realizes that there is “Judaism outside Chabad”, and we are all sensitive to that, otherwise we wouldn’t be where we are.

      I always appreciate constructive criticism. So please do not hesitate to comment in the future.

      Wishing you a happy Chodesh!

      Rabbi Levi Y. Garelik

      P.S. as this is a “yeshiva” [“yeshiva.net” remember?], allow me to add one comment to your remarks from a “Yeshiva” point of view.

      Since the readers don’t know who you are (neither do I), I am comfortable adding this general point:

      Our Chachomim tell us “Lo habaishon Lomed”, in order to excel in our studies we must constantly ask questions and not be afraid. Nonetheless, the language that we use when we question something is very important. When two people are discussing a subject, or a teacher with students, and one hears a statement which in his mind is questionable (and perhaps "incorrect"...) and would like to get a clarification, he should first review to make sure he heard it correctly and then he has two approaches: either to ask for an explanation (i.e. “can you explain that statement? It seems to contradict so and so…”) or tell the friend or teacher “you are incorrect”. The first one portrays a scholar who has an inquisitive mind searching for an explanation, however the latter sort-of “closes the door” to any explanation because the questioner already came to the conclusion that the other side is “incorrect”… according to Torah, correct and incorrect is determined after both sides are heard thoroughly, and not by just merely hearing a statement once and in passing.

      In the Yeshiva language, a question is asked in the form of “Tora hi velilmod ani zorich…”and in a manner of “hevei dan es kol hoodom lekaf zchus”.

      Yes, I know that we are in the “comment age” where everyone writes “kechol haole al rucho” and the barriers of Loshon Horo and Mentschlichkeit have been shattered. At least in the “Yeshiva setting” we should try to emulate our Chachomim that “Nohagu kovod ze loze”.

      May we all be zoche to have the right approach when we fulfill the posuk: “Vehoyo ki yisholcho….” and merit to "Tishbi Yetarez Kushiyos veabayos"....


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      • R

        Rafi -11 years ago

        Re: Chabad the best
        Hi Rabbi Garelik, 

        I thank you for your clear response.

        First of all I want to make clear that the reason I wrote to you what bothered me, was chs'veshalom not out of loshon horo, but rather because I respect your teaching.

        If I didn't I would just stop coming to your site, not bothering to respond.

        I am very glad that rather than choosing to ignore this issue, you came out and explained your point of view on this.

        I would like ask you that in the future when you make a comment like this, a simple explanation would help prevent any misunderstanding that I and I am sure others had.

        Again thank you for your classes, they are great and really appreciated.

        Wishing you a lot of hatzlocho, 


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    • S

      Shaya -7 months ago

      I personally think in order to fully understand chabad, we 1st must be an empty vessel and take in all its niggunim, stories, minhagim, etc..

           this doesn't necessitate rejecting stories of polisha tzaddikem, per many sichos and letters of the Previous Rebbe A"H are on that topic in great Broad details

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  • I

    isaac -11 years ago

    Rav Kahanman
    Which year was Rav Kahanman in your home in Milan? He passed away in Elul, 1969. You remember the visit? please tell us more.

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    • A

      Anonymous -11 years ago

      Re: Rav Kahanman
      Dear Isaac,

      You want “more”? here it is, and let me preface with a little history:

      The city of Milan is in Italy and Lugano is in Switzerland. They are about one – one and a half hour distant and we use to have to cross a border. Milano was more a Balabatishe city and Lugano was more Chasidishe. Rav Kahanman use to come to visit both cities, as many Rabonim would those days (to collect money for the various institutions).

      The story I mentioned was in the early sixties, I was then a little boy and although I was fortunate enough to see many Rabonim and Roshei Yeshivos, unfortunately I do not remember them all and when they came, but my father always use to tell us this episode.  By the way - my Rosh Hakolel (who is from Lugano), remembers when Rav Kahanman use to come and he even remembers his Drosha! However, he also doesn’t recall exactly which year but he does remember that he came several times.

      [He also mentioned to me that the Rabonim use to have more success in their collection in Milan than in Lugano…]

      BTW – my Rosh Hakolel told me even a better story, about Reb Chaim Sarna, who also use to come visit… maybe I will share it in a future shiur.

      Thank you for your inquiry.

      Rabbi Levi Y. Garelik

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  • B

    ber -11 years ago

    Great vort on chemetz that Rebbe does not let the dough be on its own, he is always kneeding it and working with it giving inspiration and chayus. I would add: When you always kneed it does not become chametz, because you are always working with it, the shliach is always doing avodah, never idle.

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    • A

      Anonymous -11 years ago

      Re: great
      Dear Ber,

      Great line!

      While my uncle was referring to the fact the Rebbe is the one that continues "kneeding", you are correct that we need also the Avoida of the Shliach, otherwise....

      Thanks for a great comment.

      Rabbi Levi Y. Garelik

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  • G

    Gavriel -11 years ago

    Nu Nu
    The Siyum Hashas did have 90,000 Jews. The GA has each year also some 5000 delegates.

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    • A

      Anonymous -11 years ago

      Re: Nu Nu
      Dear Gavriel,

      Thank you for your observation.

      Kindly read my comment to Rafi below.

      Basically, that I wasn't  talking about "numbers" (obviously) rather about the unique "nature" of the Kinus.

      Thank again for taking the time to comment.

      The Rebbe writes in his sefer "Hayom Yom": "Cherish criticism for it will help place you on the true heights". Your comments is what helps get us there, so please keep them coming (and I wish you much hatzlocho in your studies...) 

      Rabbi Levi Y Garelik.

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  • LI

    Levi Illulian -11 years ago

    chazak Ubaruch!
    Rabbi Garelik,

    your weekly class are so clear and amazing!!

    May God bless you to continue from strength to strength 

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    • A

      Anonymous -11 years ago

      Re: chazak Ubaruch!
      Thank you Levi,

      Kol Hamevorech Misborech so you should also go from strength to strength and be Mazliach in all you do!


      Rabbi Levi Y. Garelik

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Levi Garelik

  • November 2, 2012
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  • 17 Cheshvan 5773
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